The morning before the flight I walked the canal from Haggerston to the river, the way you might trace a finger along the spine of a closed book. London in early April: the plane trees still bare, the cafés putting out their first chairs, the kind of cold that gets into the pages of a paperback in a coat pocket.
I had been packing and re-packing for three days. By the end the rucksack contained, with ruthless economy, two shirts, a jumper, a windproof, two pairs of socks, a notebook, two rolls of film, the Nikon, charger, a single book (Eothen, Kinglake, 1844, paperback, spine broken), antibiotics, paracetamol, a sleeve of digestive biscuits, and a passport.
Stansted at five in the morning. The terminal almost empty, the coffee almost drinkable, the boarding gate so distant the walk to it felt like the first stage of the journey proper. I bought a bottle of water and an apple. I sat by the window. The plane lifted off into low cloud over Essex and the country, which I had loved imperfectly for years, disappeared in about eleven seconds.
- Coffee
- £3.40
- Tube (peak)
- £2.90
- Pint
- £6.20
- Apple, terminal
- £1.50
- Last text
- “landed in a queue”
- Weather
- 14°C · grey · 4mm rain
- Pack weight
- 9.4 kg
“To go away is to die a little — but it is the only sort of dying that returns you, and louder, to the small unfinished business of being alive.” — Notebook, departure day